Parenting, Top tips

It’s The Little Things You Do

It's The Little Things You Do

It’s The Little Things You Do That Show Your Kids You Love Them

It’s the little things we do that show our kids we love them. There’s no need to prove our love with extravagant gifts – no matter how much our kids complain we don’t love them enough because we haven’t bought them the latest this and that! There’s no need to go overboard at the school gates with hugs and kisses, as this will only embarrass our poor children anyway. There are other, more subtle ways to show our kids that we love, care, and cherish them, and we have some examples of this right here.

Tell them

We show our kids we love them by telling them we love them. It’s not soppy to tell our children we love them, and while they probably don’t need to be reassured of this fact verbally, it’s still nice to be told those three little words. When did you last say to your children, “I love you?” No matter how old they are, make the effort to tell them today. Sure, they might roll their eyes at you, but secretly, they will be over the moon that you told them. Say those words every day.

Making the effort

We show our kids we love them by giving them our undivided attention. This isn’t always easy within a large family where sibling rivalry rears its head. But as the parent, you need to make the effort to spend time with each, finding time to ask them about their day, and taking part in activities with them that are things they are interested in. Create a mental note in your head each day, telling yourself to find time with each of your children. And when they come to you for something, never be too busy not to make time for them. Put down your phone or the television remote, and be present for them.

Making time

We show our kids we love them by arranging time to take part in family activities. This could be anything from having a home cinema night at the weekend or a camping trip during the holidays. And when we plan any activities, we need to remember the word ‘family.’ Let your kids have a say in the planning, as not only will this alleviate the risk of them not enjoying something, but it will show them that you have taken their needs and wants into consideration. And again, you are taking time out of your schedule to spend time with them, and while our kids don’t always notice the fact, this is possibly more important than the activities you are embarking on together.

It's The Little Things You Do

Being proud

We show our kids we love them by recognising their achievements. We display certificates of awards in picture frames around our homes. We offer words of praise when they have done something well. We let other people know how wonderful our kids are. We celebrate the fact that our kids have skills and talents, and we let them know just how proud we are of them.

Being forgiving

We show our kids we love them by not bearing a grudge when they have done something wrong. While it would be great if they resembled little angels all of the time, the reality is our kids can be difficult. They can do things that upset us. And they can exhibit behaviour patterns that we most certainly haven’t taught them. While love is about letting them the know the difference between right and wrong, and showing appropriate discipline so they recognise boundaries, love is also about forgiveness and offering a path for redemption. So, don’t penalise your kids for too long. Don’t bring up their misdeeds in conversation long after things have blown over. Practice forgiveness and unconditional love, because they aren’t perfect, but then again, neither are you! One day you might need their forgiveness, so be a decent role model.

Not criticizing

We show our children we love them by not putting them down. We don’t criticise them for failing at something they have tried to do. We are only human, and none of us are perfect. We need to take a positive stance. When our children fall down, we help them up again. If they struggle to do something, we help them to be better. Though if they are never going to be good at a particular thing, we don’t push them too hard. Rather, we focus on the things they are good at and encourage them to play to their strengths. We lift them up rather than put them down; we offer words of encouragement and not words that will diminish who they are.

Accepting them

We show our children we love them by accepting them for who they are. They will make choices in life that don’t always correspond to our own ideals, but provided those choices aren’t criminal or damaging to them, we should offer acceptance. They don’t have to like the same things we do. They don’t have to follow the same sports teams we do. They don’t have to follow career paths that we think are good for them. Our kids have the capacity to make decisions of their own, and while we might want to ask questions and challenge them occasionally, we should also know when to shut up and let them steer their own paths. They are who they are, and that’s a good thing!

Being there

We show our children we love them by just showing up when they need us. When they need a shoulder to cry on, we are there for them. When they need someone to talk to, we offer that listening ear. When they are performing at school, we are there in the front row. When they appear miserable and low, we offer that arm of support. When other people threaten them, we stand up in defense of our children. We show up right when they need us because we love them, and this sometimes means having to sacrifice our own needs to care for their needs instead.

So today, show your children you love them. Do it in all of the ways we have described, or do it in ways that are personal to you. And then remember to take the opportunity to say…I LOVE YOU!!

They will become better people because of what you do and say today.

***Collaborative post***

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